Uncertainty and lack of progress still plague my increasingly busy schedule. Friday morning (Feb. 11) I had a blood draw that showed that my Hemoglobin and Hematocrit had fallen to 5.6 and 17.0, both of which are critically low. I decided to get the ball rolling myself by calling two doctors, scheduling a blood transfusion to help me feel as good as I could feel, all things considered. I literally did everything in my power to make sure I would get "plugged in" as soon as possible, which meant I had to cancel our middle school wrestling practice to get to the hospital in the afternoon once my teaching obligations were met.

So, ready with about 5 hours of time killers to get through the transfusion, I showed up at the hospital at my scheduled time of 3 pm. Admitted, in a hospital room, and happily reading ESPN the Magazine, my nurse comes in and informs me that my blood (which of course is almost as rare as my running list of conditions) has yet to be driven from SEATTLE and the soonest it would be here is 5 pm. Are you kidding me?

Knowing that a 5 pm start time may or may not get me a hospital tray upon my return, I decided to give in to mounting week long craving for a Boomers burger. If I couldn't refuel my system then I would at least refuel my stomach. It's amazing how much one can find peace of mind over a Boomers burger, waffle fries, an Oreo shake, and a copy of the Echo Ads.

Before leaving the hospital, the nurse and I agreed I would just show up closer to 6 unless I heard from him otherwise, and a call to my cell phone at 5:30 confirmed that the blood was not ready yet and there was no point in coming in earlier. However, I was out and about and listless so I went to the hospital anyway to just check in and visit Kelly who works only one floor above. As I'm walking into the hospital lobby, the nurse blows up my phone to inform me that the blood would not leave Seattle until 8 pm and would be arriving no later than 10. At this point my heart just sunk in my chest and my frustration was overwhelming. Did they know what my numbers were? Did they know I had somewhere to be tomorrow? Did they know the unit closes at 11:30 pm and I would have to be admitted overnight to get the blood now? I was ready to drive to Seattle myself, not to get the blood but to unload on the incompetent employees of the Puget Sound Blood Bank that were slowing my life down.

Here I pause. My condition should slow my life down. I should be "taking it easy." The schedule I run and the energy with which I run it is unnatural considering my current condition. All I can say is that I can't help it. I thrive on the passion with which I teach and coach. I feel energized getting up early in the morning, putting on a pressed shirt and tie, and working with middle school students all day. I receive a second wind walking to the locker room to get ready for wrestling practice or during the 15 minute drive to Squalicum to work with the Storm wrestlers. One of the reasons I wanted the blood Friday night was so that I could be recharged and ready for the girls regional wrestling tournnament at Sedro-Woolley High School on Saturday (where one of our girls took 3rd and qualified for the state tournament...GO STORM!).

The decision was made to schedule the transfusion for Sunday morning at 9 am when the blood would be ready, I would be rested, and there would be no further scheduling conflicts.

And that is where this blog finds me...sitting at the keyboard of a Dell net-book, washing down graham crackers and peanut butter with grape juice (hospital staples), watching NASCAR qualifying for next week's Daytona 500, and receiving 2 units of much needed red blood cells.

I describe the source of my daily energy as "Hybrid like," but without the battery. I always feel like I have the energy to do what I want and need to do in my daily life. There is no other explanation for this sustained energy than God given. Forgive me for any cliches that may sneak in here, but in my mind there is only one explanation for my ability to carry on. My physical and mental strength is being upheld and sustained by God almighty, who has my best in mind, loves me more than anything in the world, gave is son for me that I might have life in this life and the life to come.

I am absolutely hooked on Zac Brown Band right now. The song "Let It Go" provides anthem-like lyrics for me as listen:

Keep your heart above your head and your eyes wide open
so this world can't find a way to leave you cold

You know you're not the only ship out on the ocean

Save your strength for things that you can change
forget the ones you can't
You gotta let it go!

It makes it easy to let it go in the hands of the Almighty!